You can build a home that looks "cool" without looking like a waco compound. This would require a little forethought to do so.

An excellent site for some ideas. These guys are actual castle builders. There are several photos that show construction. You can get a few good ideas from them.

Caslte magic web site

Around here anytime a house is built looking a lot like or even just like a castle the comments are "ooh that's cool" Not one I've ever heard said anything about it's defense capabilities. On the other hand someone built what many called a Y2K house complete with gun slits in the basement and stuff. Everyone who saw it picked up on it and stil talks about it.

Theres some good info in the original post. Lots to think about in designing a buiding